the only time I interact with my family is when I’m highly intoxicated
"just give me one sign, one fucking sign, that you care"
- unknown (via fvckem)
(Source: broken-heavily, via iamphamtastic)
what if childbirth is just the pain of the 9 periods you missed
and all this time i thought it was the baby ripping through your vagina
Hot Italian Guy: I have a big dick… guess how big it is